2009 Christmas letter

Here is our Christmas letter that never got sent for this year:

Dear Family and Friends,
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
We have had quite the banner year around here!

Alex is in first grade, and last spring and this fall, not once did we have to send him to school in his pajamas or without a breakfast! Quite an accomplishment - especially if you saw our house in the early mornings! (A true Christmas letter must have exclamation points after all the sentences....) He is a bright boy and talks our heads off constantly! Patrick and I now have stock in ear plug companies!

Vivianne 'got out into the world' this year when she started dance classes at our church. However we pulled her out of them early. As much as Patrick and I love to pay for her to sit in a corner and watch other kids dance, we decided this is something we could do at home - for free. Much to her dismay, her dance class was 'fun' but didn't offer enough time to play with toys.

Avalon is quite the stylish gal for three. She can in just one day, pull out every piece of clothing from her closet and dress-up bin and try them on! She doesn't yet know how to really fold clothes though, so we look forward to teaching her new skill sets!

Talia is a fourth born baby in 5.5 years. We are so thankful that she has survived the year, and has never gone without food (for too long) nor has any trauma happened thanks to eager and loving older bro and sisters!

Tara has had a full year too. (Why does everyone talk about themselves third-person in Christmas letters???) She hasn't traveled anywhere amazing, but she does have an amazing amount of laundry to do each day. She never went anywhere exotic, but she has scrapped some very exoctic food off of dirty dishes that are never-ending. Sometimes there was even exotic things growing in a particular dish left to be discovered in the far reaches.... of the basement. She likes to garden too - which is fun since the garden didn't grow this year. Life is always full of surprises!

Patrick is an amazing husband busy with his job and helping Tara with the kids and house. We find cleaning the house exciting, because when we get to a room that has had 'junk' on the floor for forever and we actually clean it all up - the carpet looks brand new! And since we are trying to remodel half our home, the 'areas of junk' that collect are bountiful indeed! After the kids are in bed at night we enjoy passing out on the couch from the exhaustion of the day and staring at the walls.

Hope your next year is truly exciting too!
Love, us

Solace by Design

Sometimes, it feels like most of my house looks like this:



I love to have a vibrant and colorful house (walls). I don't mean to sound un-PC here, but remember that I'M not the person who said this. ....Do you remember the movie Fools Rush In in which a Latina wife painted every wall of her home a bright and different color?? Well, my home is not like that - exactly... but I don't have white walls either. And this is the comment I got one day: I have company over and they were seeing the walls for the first time. They remarked that "When you move, you'll have to sell your house to Mexicans."

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold the phone. Don't get mad at me for repeating that. If you think about it, it could be a huge compliment. I'm just trying to get my design for the house communicated to you. I don't like bland. On the other hand, I don't have teal or orange walls. I fall somewhere in between.

But I like solace too. Peace. Quiet. Sophisticated beauty.
Hence, welcome to the master bedroom. The room is not boring. The walls are not white, but a warm, inviting, and calming... beige. The entire room is beige, black, and white. And I love it. The lack of color is really peaceful. Different. Serene. It is not lacking for patterns I guarantee. The *damask* pattern repeats throughout the room - as does a vintage couture feel. Art and a knick-knack here or there with mens and ladies hats/shoes/dresses on them. All in beige, black or white.

Well, you get the idea. I got new towels for Christmas from my rocking sis (SIL) - and I wanted to show off the new look. I love it!!! Thanks my sista! You be rocking our bathroom now!! :)

Happy New Year!!

We are about to enter a new decade. Wowsers. I mean, I know this is not new news to you. Everyone is aware of the upcoming new year. Duh, right?? But it is not just a new year this time, it is a whole new decade.

I consider myself to be young, so this is only the 3rd time I remember a decade change. I remember when the clock turned midnight and 1990 became the new year. Wow! I was twelve, what a cool year to become a teenager! Just after midnight I remember standing at our large front room picture window, hiding behind the long curtains staring into the street. There is a street light in front of my mom's home and it was lighting up all of the snow. It was really pretty. And really peaceful. I had deep thoughts. (that is not a joke) I truly was pondering what lay ahead for me in life and had a very 'grown up' moment for a twelve year old.

Next decade up: 2000. I won't soon forget that year. Patrick and I were on a mini "break". I went to a wedding that night, and since I was on a 'break', it made the wedding a little less fun. Especially since they played our song for their video montage. :( So not cool. (Don't worry, all is okay - we ended up getting married and he surprised me by singing that song to me at our wedding!) :)
We survived Y2K, I quickly got back together with Patrick... and life went on. I remember where I was at midnight though, and it was definitely the start of another decade I won't forget.

Here we are at 2010. Will this decade change be emblazoned on my brain like the other two?? I have four little kids. Will I pass out from exhaustion long before midnight and sleep through it?? Will it be anti-climatic just sitting on the couch watching Ryan Seacrest rock it out in Las Vegas and NYC?? I can tell you this... we have no big smashing glamorous party planned. We have none that we are invited to. Just us. But maybe that is the perfect combination. Maybe that will be my permanent memory for this decade. It is the first new decade Patrick and I will ring in together.....(thanks to that little break, but anyhoo.....)

So maybe just the two of us on the couch kissing at midnight with a rum and coke, or a cherry Pepsi, or sparkling cider in our hands is all the 'fantastic' memory I need. Either way, I'm looking forward to a whole new DECADE to explore and live out loud. I love getting 'older' because I like who I become every year more and more. If I can continue that trend, then life is good. Really good.

The Magic of Christmas

Finally it is here. That wonderful, peaceful, content feeling that comes with family time on Christmas day.

Yesterday was hectic. At one point late last night I was in my dress clothes and ...socks.... trying to push our minivan up an icy hill. Not exactly what you envision yourself doing on Chrismas Eve...or any day for that matter.

But now, it is Christmas. All FOUR children are happy and quiet sitting here with me watching a sweet animated movie. Homemade bread is baking in the kitchen (mmm...smells sooo good!)....I had a nap, everyone is thrilled with their gifts, there is snow outside....ahhh.....


Take a deep breath and revel in all that is. The beauty of life. The simplicity of a small heartfelt gift. The pure joy of a child with a new toy. A baby's smile, laugh, and babble. A hug. A Saviour that came to be with you.


We had our church Christmas Eve service last night. It was nice to just settle in with family in the midst of our last minute craziness and enjoy the season and the reason for celebration.



Hope your Christmas was magical too!

Christmas in the real world

You can be all Martha-Stewartish this season and brag about how you are making precious perfect Christmas cookies with your babies at your side. You can tell me how you all dressed in 19th century garb and caroled your neighborhood and then the retirement home. You can say you served soup with your children at the homeless shelter,...blah, blah, blah.... and the list goes on and on. All with perfectly well-behaved children in tow, right?? I'm sure you would tell me that your kids aren't fussy, or crying at all, right?

Can I move to your world??

I will admit that I am exaggerating a bit, but doesn't it ever feel for like this:
"Stop crying and smile for this picture... or I'm gonna swat ya!"

"Hurry up and GET OFF THE FLOOR, you're messing up your hair - and get over here to get on your Chirstmas dress!"

"GET IN THE CAR! We are late for the Christmas service!"

"Stop WHINING - this is supposed to be fun. NOW START HAVING FUN!"

Overall, my kids are REALLY good kids. Today is a tough day and I admit it. I'm stressed out and not ready for Christmas (so, you know, I'm writing on my blog....), and the kids are having an off day. All that "wrapped" into one and it turns out it is not a fun 'present' today. But, alas, it is finally nap time. Time to push the reset button. I ate food. That always seems to help. :) I jumped on here to say hello to y'all, and hopefully rested children will wake up with sweet spirits, cute smiles and a happy outlook!

Wishing you a merry Christmas and hoping you have time to hurry up and rest!! ;)

Put That Thing Back Where It Came From

So here we are in the Christmas season. Festive stores, music, entertainment, clothing and blogs.

And yet, I am here a few days before Christmas writing to you about.... boogers.

Sorry. I'm a mom. And mom-hood never stops. Not even at Christmas. Oh well.

We were driving around town in our new minivan yesterday. Ahh....love the new ride. We were running errands and my three year old makes an announcement from the middle row of seats.

"Mom! I found a booger!!" (said rather excitedly. more like she just found a pot of gold. ehhh....pardon the pun)

"Where did you find it?" I ask. (knowing full well, but enjoying the craziness of a conversation with a three year old.)

"In my nose!!" (imagine that!!)

Not wanting to have a booger wiped on our new car, or wanting to establish that as 'okay' behavior, I sugggested she put it on her blankie she brought with her. I figured this would make her think twice about it since her blankie is so treasured.

I was right about her thinking twice, but she still managed to surprise me with what came next.

"I'll just put it back...."

I'm sitting at a red light turned towards my daughter - and I see her refuse to wipe the offender on the blanket, look at it, and then shove it and the finger deep into her nose!! Aaghhh! I didn't know if I should laugh or scream. ;)

Ahh... the joys of motherhood.

More Toys, Please...

What is it about our culture that translates the size or cost of gifts into love??

We draw names for Christmas each year and this year I have my sister, her husband, and her two kids. Now, if she reads this, she is in for no surprises, as I have already shared these thoughts with her. I'm just taking a minute to share my thoughts with you too.

She has two and a half kids (one is still in the "oven"). I love them dearly. Sweet kids. I love being an aunt. I have five nephews and one precious niece. Somehow, though, I feel like society as a whole gets to judge how much you love someone by what you gave them.

In the email my sister sent with her 'wish list', it was my perception that the kids have a ton of toys. Toys that are all not even being played with right now, with some in Tupperware bins. (I hear ya loud and clear! Ditto our home.) The wish list for her son included things like.....pajamas.

So.... with out spoiling all the fun.... I got the kids some of the things on the wish list and avoided the toy hunt. Now, I should tell you that the kids are 1, and 3 years old, and will not remember if their aunt really blows it this year. Ya know??
But as I look at their family's unwrapped gifts as I prepare for Friday, I feel the absence of large, plastic wrapped and shiny toys means I love them less. Totally not true... I just really love their mommy and don't want to burden her with more things to litter her floor! :)

I'm a little mad that society has made me feel this way. Did you ever see the Office episode where Michael Scott gets a handmade oven mitt for the Christmas gift exchange and he is super offended at the "cheap handmade" gift??? That feeling totally permeates our culture and even I have fallen victim at times. Partly right now, in this season as I feel "certain articles of clothing" are not a "loving" gift.

I have no real conclusion to this post, other than to vent my frustration at my own thoughts and society's shallow mentality. But, there is hope. I remember being about ....6?.... years old and unwrapping Raggedy Ann underwear from my Aunt Diane. I was like... "underwear, seriously???", but I did love those panties!! And I still remember it twenty some years later! So... you never know my dear niece and nephew.... maybe I'll be your favorite auntie after all!!

Can I hear an "Amen"....

Overheard today:

"I'd like to be the ideal mother, but I'm too busy raising my children."



I hear ya girl, I hear ya....

"Run, Forest, Run!!"

When you get to know me you learn one thing:

I will only run if someone is chasing me. I will run out of a building if it is on fire. I will only run if there is a wasp around. (story for another day)

That is my motto. Run from danger. You don't run for pleasure. Only crazy people do that! Why in the world would I do that to myself? Sounds like torture.

So.... then there's my husband. He likes me. (yea!) And he wants me to live for a long time. So He wants me to exercise my heart. (I don't actually exercise. I've attempted it a few times in my life though....)

We have had a Wii for three years now, and one of my favorite things about it is the 'exercise' "games". (I am using the word 'game' loosely here...) About a year ago we bought Wii Active with the Bob Green 30 day fitness challenge. Patrick and I made it all the way through..... four whole days of the the challenge. Whew! Go us!! :)

I picked it up again about two weeks ago. Again, I have made it through the first four days. (in the last two weeks mind you)

This particular game is torture for me, as they "make" you run. Ugh. Hate it. Especially with my huge nursing boobs.(TMI???)

However... I think.... I actually think that maybe it is having a positive affect on me. Last night I dreamt I was running - for exercise - and the most shocking of all.... I liked it.

What spell have you put me under Bob Green?!?!?

So maybe in the year 2010 I may actually be a person who exercises. Who knows.

Not the planned morning I was hoping for....

I backed out of my driveway this morning to take the boy to school and my emergency brake light and ABS light on the dashboard were both on. Hmm.

I pulled forward. The car felt like the brake was on. Oh silly. I reached down to release it. Um... it was not engaged. Freaky. The car was driving like the brake was on, the lights were on... but the brake itself was not on.

Thankfully I was able to get my son to ride to school with my neighbor who was just pulling out of her driveway to take her kids there. (THANKS GOD!)

I managed to get the van back in our driveway. Called hubby. Explained. Explained again. Sometimes I think he, and other guys in general, think women are overreacting. Like the car isn't really broke and I've lost my mind. What part of "it is driving like the brake is on" is not clear? Put your parking brake on and try driving. That pretty much sums it up.

So I go in the house after unloading all three other kids and start researching the internet. Turns out, when those two particular lights are on and the brake 'feels' stuck, it is extremely dangerous to drive the car.

Can I trust the internet? I call the local mechanic. Yep. Call for a tow. Don't drive the van ma'am. Okay. Tow on the way. What a morning! I was supposed to be at Target getting errands accomplished! Oh well! Thank you God that I didn't try driving it! (THANKS GOD!)




The tow truck driver comes and is from Randy's towing. I know the owners wife and son and daughter. I ask him if these are still the owners. They are. And then, all of a sudden, the tow truck driver and I bond. He has been working for them for 30 years and knows the owners like family. We talk about what a great family they are and how they have helped him through some really rough patches in his life. Aww.. a moment with the tow truck driver. (THANKS GOD.)

So, the morning didn't go as planned. In fact, if the internet is correct, we may be out several hundred dollars. Bummer. But, in the midst of a very different day than I foresaw, God has been here. My son has a ride home from school, we are all safe. The van got safely to the mechanic, and I had a moment with someone I would not have had otherwise. It is nice to see the fingerprints of God on your life, even when He is painting a different picture than you had in mind!

Little Drummer Boy

Feeling a little bit like the drummer boy today.

I love that song. Love it. Almost every rendition too.

Have you listned to it recently? The drummer boy has nothing to give the King. Ever feel like that??

I know my posts my seem kinda depressing lately. I'm not depressed. Just busy trying to clean a home, and thinking about my life.

The truth of it is, I am not the drummer boy. I have a rich, rich life... but sometimes we don't think we have it all so good.

My hubby is a Dr. that travels to people's homes to treat them there when they cannot get out to a doctor's office. He has helped so many people, and sometimes in critical moments, like the other day when he walked into a patient's home to find her on the floor. Who knows how long she would've been stuck there, unable to get up or call for help without him walking in on her. He is amazing in our family life too.

Then there is me. Stuck here. In the freezing cold. Attempting to clean a house. With 3-4 kids with me at all times. I offer what again??? I mean, we have learned from older posts that my cleaning skills are not so good apparently....
I'm not out reaching the masses. I have no big fancy public status. I don't have money to change someone's life.

My mind drew a blank. What did I have to offer the King?..... um.... just me. That's all. Maybe there is more that I can't think of, but still, right now, I can't think of something great I can do for the King. Frankly, I'm having a hard time thinking of a small thing I could give Him.

(Yes, yes, I know... raising kids for God is huge, important.... etc, etc. But when you're in the trenches and it feels like they are not 'hearing' you at all sometimes....)

So as I was rockin' around the kitchen this morning while that song played on the radio and I was feeding rice cereal to the baby, I could really relate to that little Drummer Boy.

All I have is me. Thankfully, that - is enough.

'Tis the Reason

I'm guessing you assume that I am talking about the 'reason for the season'. No... not today, but perhaps soon. I am talking about the reason my house is a mess.

It came to me like an epiphany. This is how the morning started:

I woke up with a bunch of motivation to 'get going'. Yea! Mornings are not my thing... so it took me a minute (okay an hour or so...) but by 8:00am I was up and running.

That is when I realized why the house is a disaster. Here is my quest to do laundry and the dishes. Two very basic, everyday chores that must be completed....or so you would hope.

I am dressed, ah.... now to grab the laundry basket in my room to take to the washer..."mom! Can I color on the computer?" No.... I pick up the basket and walk to the stairs.

(Screams from the girl's room) I run to check on them. Everyone is alive. I head back to take the dirty laundry downstairs. I actually get all the way to the laundry room when another child comes running in to say that the baby spit up all over. "I'll get it in a minute...." I casually say. But when they tell me it is up her noise, I decide to run to rescue the babe.

While I am upstairs I realize the babe has also exploded her morning diaper. So I change her. Oops! The diaper pail is overflowing. I go to put the baby in the living room to play and grab a trash bag.

I go into the kitchen to get a trash bag and realize I still haven't packed Alex his school lunch. I yell for him to bring me his lunchbox and unpack it.

I take the trash bag back to the baby's room and start to put it in the pail. The phone rings. It is my husband. He needs the number to (church/a friend/ the bank...). I put the trash bag down and head for the phone book. "Can I call you back?" I ask. The baby is being "moved" by her older sister and this is looking scary.

I scold the older sister for trying to move the baby and my son announces that his backpack is "missing."

Well... you get the point I hope. So, here I wake up with all this motivation and so far in the last hour these are my accomplishments:

Laundry is IN the laundry room, but not started.

I realized I have a lunch to make.

The baby is changed and rescued (twice).

The diaper pail has been emptied, but there is no new bag replaced. Good luck to the next diaper changer.

I am now on a hunt for a backpack - since school starts in 30 minutes.


So... an hour later my house still looks like crud, and some may argue it is even worse off.... At least I realized WHY it looks like this. I never get to finish a single blazing task!!


....Oh my goodness.... I still need to call my hubby back!!

All I want for Christmas.....

Okay, here's the thing: I do like to have a clean house.
I dream about having one. I imagine what a clutter-free, simply organized and tidy house would look like.

I imagine it, because I do not have it.

I have a pile of books (from my son's room) stacked 18 inches high in the livingroom. Why?? Good question. Ask the three little munchkins who put them there late last night for apparently no reason.

I cannot find my fingernail clippers. Generally they are in the bathroom. That is the logical place. But nooo.... that's not where they are now that I have a nail broken down to the base and really need to trim it before it snags every soft piece of material in the house.

In the past I have found muffin tins in the master bathroom. What?? I mean, c'mon kids....!

We have strewn coats, and paper, and socks, and toys in basically every room of the house. (UGH!)

That is just part of having four kids 6 and under I guess. I remember when we just had one little baby in our townhome. The ENTIRE home was model home clean for three weeks at a time. Now I can only manage to get one room clean at a time - EVER.

Ahh.... I say to myself.... the baby nursery is PERFECT. Clean, tidy, organized.
OOP! But wait, don't leave that room!!

The livingroom is clean and beautiful. The doorbell rings. What? You have to use the bathroom? Oh no!! The bathroom is disgusting! Don't go in there.... there is a gas station down the street. Think you can hold it???

The kitchen sees perfect cleanliness less often due the fact it is generally used more than O'Hare airport during the course of a normal day. Forget the days we actually cook. Like yesterday when we decided it would be "fun" to have the three older kids decorate Christmas cookies. Don't get me wrong. A ton of "fun" and memories. But the kitchen looks like something exploded.

Frankly, I'm tired. I'm tired of the pointlessness. I can't STOP cleaning...(obviously) but it would be nice to see a reward for your work. It would be so stinking AWESOME to clean a room and be able to SHOW someone. Before I can sneeze the room is usually torn to bits again. At least that is how it feels.

We have our kids clean their own rooms.... they help with other tasks.... but apparently our 'balance' is still 'off'. Oh well!

For now our master bedroom is less of a peaceful, romantic retreat than it is an obstacle course from bedside to bathroom. (Certainly makes a 2am pee more intersting.)

Does anyone relate? Did I only end up making you feel superior since your own home is so clean?? Do you look down on me now? :) If you can relate- then good. We are not alone. Let's stick together! Moms of messy houses - unite!

I have an idea. I'm gonna post this blog, and maybe, just maybe, see if I can find out what color laminate our kitchen counters are.....

Don't Ask

When baby spit up has a chance to dry on your skin it is sticky. Kinda tacky like.

But, it is not as sticky as when new born baby poop dries on your skin.


Don't ask me how I know these two facts. Just take my word for it.

The Right Place

Kids have a remarkable knack for speaking the truth.

I mean, like when you look like a dork and they tell you straight to your face when no other human would do that to you.

Or when your kids say you look beautiful (and you do) even though you feel like a sloppy loser.

(Have you ever had your kids walk in on you while undressing or changing your clothes and start laughing at your "funny wrinkly" tummy??? - Yeah... well kid - YOU made it all wrinkly....)

Anyway, the other night we were setting up the Christmas tree. We put the fake metal branches into the metal tree stand. We put the blinking multi-colored lights on the tree. We put the numerous non-matching, but quite sentimental, ornaments on the branches. I put on velvet cream bows in hopes of "tying it all together". Then we put the tree skirts below. (Yes, we have two this year. One thanks to my sister in law and one because of my son. One tree, two skirts...)

So, the tree was finished and standing there, blinking lights in all it's glory. Our six year old son was the only one left in the room with my husband and I after putting the younger girls to bed. The room was tidy other than the nativity scene which sat in the middle of the floor. Alex went over to it and put it on the tree skirt under the tree.

Immediately I said, "That's not where that goes, Alex. We will find a place for it though...."

Actually, that is exactly where it should go, right?? You are supposed to put gifts under the tree. And Jesus coming to this earth is the greatest gift of all time. He came, He died for you and me, and then He rose from the grave to reign in Heaven. He lives in our hearts today because he came to earth in that tiny, dirty manger.

Perhaps once again my child has spoken the truth in a way adults can't. Perhaps we have just started a new tradition in our home. Either way, my eyes and heart saw something in a new light the other night. Thanks for speaking the truth kiddo!

"Not In This House"

Okay, so when you become a parent, you begin to discuss things and say sentences you never would have otherwise. For instance - dirty diapers and potty training escapades are "okay" dinner party conversation.

You find yourself saying things like "No Susie, we don't use toilet water for our play teapot".

Or in a public bathroom your toddler may praise you loudly, "Good job going pee-pee Mommy!"

Or another all-time favorite public restroom conversation, "Mama, how come you don't have a penis like Daddy???" (This is usually said loud enough that the little old lady four stalls down from you begins to faint.

Here is the latest I-only-said-this-out-loud-because-I'm-a-parent scenario:
I enter our livingroom and hear our 4 and 3 year old girls talking in the adjacent bedroom. Our four year old is laying on her bed while the 3 year old is standing on the bed over her. These are the words that filter out to my ears - "Okay", says the 4 yr old laying down, "now I be the toilet and you pee on me."

Heavens to Betsy!!
I of course rush into the room to see the standing 3 year old (who was only just potty-trained in the last two months and hence the origin of this particular make-believe) start to pull her pants down over her rear as she locks eyes with me.

I say quite matter of factly "We do NOT play toilet in this house young lady. Do you understand me??"

Thankfully no one actually pottied. (I knew this, but thought I'd clear it up for you....) And my daughter thoughtfully clarified the situtation. "Mommmm.... we're just 'tending!"

And... so another entry in the book of 'things I never thought I'd say out loud".

November 30

So, it is a big day here in the DeMoss household. Our two youngest have reached another milestone in their lives.



Our third born, Avalon, or Avi Joy as we like to call her, turns 3 today! How did the last three years fly by so fast?!? I remember the hospital nursery returning her to us because she was 'disturbing the other babies' like it was yesterday. I remember bringing her home from the hospital and having her blood-curling infant scream each night between 8-11pm. (She was our toughest ever baby, but she is a now darling child.)
Last year when she turned two she became my comic relief. I remember thinking our first born was funny. I was wrong. He is not half as funny as Avalon. She is the crack up of the family. I mean - hilarious. She surprises me. Where does she get half this stuff??? Her comedic material is unusual, never ending, and entertaining.
Now she is three. Wow. Potty trained. Dresses herself. Learning to make her bed. Brushes her teeth, and copies every little word her big bro and sis say.
I look forward to her new year and the many ways I know she will entertain me!



Talia Rose - our fourth born and third girl - turns 7 months old today. She is pure delight. We marvel everyday at what a happy, pleasing, and sweet baby she is. I guess you have to be a content, easy-going person to be fourth born in 5.5 years! She started rolling over at two months old. That had me worried, but thankfully that is as far as her 'skills' go for now. She doesn't sit on her own or crawl yet and I'm okay with that. She rolls all over the room and that is enough to keep up with when the older siblings have legos, Barbie shoes, and crayons on the floor! :)


So, here's to you, today, my Avi-Joy and Talia Rose! We love you and are so glad you are in our lives! We are all richer because of it!

My Black Friday

Okay, I know you were all waiting for my next blog..... yeah....
Well, I just thought I'd let you know that I am in fact alive. In fact, it is my computer that is 'walking toward the light', on 'death row', and saying it's final goodbyes. In fact, that is one thing we are looking for this black Friday. A new computer.

Let me recap the last few weeks of computer usage:

Turn computer on.
30 minutes later the wallpaper appears but the internet is still considering opening up.
10 minutes later the hourglass for the internet goes away.
20 minutes later I wake up on the couch with the computer on my lap and notice that AOL is 'up'.
I enter a web address.
BIG mistake. You can't actually USE the internet.
1.5 hours later you have been on two pages.
UGH!!!
10 minutes later you realize it is not worth it and give up. AGAIN.

So in this tight economy of reusing and fixing, we are taking the plunge to PURCHASE. I hope. Soon. I miss you. I miss my email. I miss the cyberworld.

Around the table

We all know how important it is for a family to have dinner together. It helps kids in life with social skills, solving problems, better school scores....etc, etc.

What you never know though, is who exactly is going to show up for your family dinner. Last night we had:

A sick two year old girl

Tinkerbell

And the 'invisible man'

(Our two year old was actually under the weather, our four year old was dressed as Tinkerbell, and our 6 yr old kept diving his head under the table telling us he was the invisible man!)

Dinner with four young kids is NEVER dull. .... and our fourth kid wasn't even at the table last night! She was napping. Sheesh! :)

Life right now...

Okay - I need to start a therapy blog. I'm sure that one would be written on almost daily. A place to vent without bumming out the world around you - you know???

Maybe you have no idea what I'm talking about.

I actually have had a ton of perfect topics to blog about. Funny stuff. Crazy stuff. Cute stuff. But.... alas, I haven't been on here much lately. The computer that is. Life just happens sometimes. The internet isn't the all and all - shocking news huh?? :)

Right now.... today.... at this moment however.... life isn't happening. I'm blogging to say that I'm here. I'm alive, but ... in my mind, barely. Have you ever just felt super disconnected from life and reality? Like you're in some home-bound bubble?? Like the world is stopped, or possibly in slow motion? That everyone has a 'life' except maybe you??

Maybe I need to go shopping. Get out of the house. Go out to eat with hubby or girlfriends.

Maybe it is the cloud-covered day with a semi-lit house and the fact I feel I have been inside this house for EVER with small children. This is the danger of being a stay at home mom. Feeling like the 'real' world is ceasing to exist. Hope I'm not bumming you out here. Hope to post something more life-like soon.

For now, I need to get ready to take the kids to the park on this mostly warm November day. Gonna head out into the 'real' world.... this will have to do for now.... :) Shopping and eating with girlfriends will have to wait a bit longer....Ta-Ta!

Be the Boss

We now have a potty-trained two year old! Just this month - so the lifestyle is fairly new. She has been working on this for months - and one day early October informed me she wanted to wear panties. Just like that. I was wary of poop in cotton panties, but she was ready. No accidents. (yea!)

Skip to this last Saturday. We had a soccer game for our 6 year old son at 11:30. So, our little 'Avi' went potty before we left the house at 11:00. We went to the game, which ended at 12:30 and decided to head out of town about 50 miles to a local farm where you can pick apples/pumpkins, etc.

So, we ran by the local grocery store to pick up snacks and do a potty run. Avi went potty at the store again - oh, and did I mention she is in panties - not a pull up.

We get to the farm and ride the 'hay ride tractor' out to the pumpkin patch. We are walking around in the heat for what seems like FOR EVER for my six year old to find the perfect pumpkin. (too bad 90% of them are old and already rotting. This makes the search 90% longer)

Avi announces in the middle of the pumpkin patch she has to poop. We scramble and take her to the outhouse in the field. No show. The poop went a-hiding.

We leave the farm - eventually - and start to make the drive home. We are 50 miles from home and in the middle of freaking NO WHERE when she screeches from the back seat in all urgency that she has to go potty! We push the speed limit and beg her to hold it - telling her that is what 'big girls' do. (There is not even a shoulder of the two lane highway to pull over on)

This scenario repeats for the next half hour as we seem to creep towards civilization and public restrooms. She is constantly teetering between an urgent, frantic "I gotta poop", and a strong, "I will go at home".

Suddenly, our six year old, who sits in the back row of the minivan with her, says quite emphatically "Be the boss of your poop Avi!"

Needless to say, me and hubby burst with laughter. Be the boss of your poop. Funniest thing I have heard in a long, long time.

FYI- she did make it until we got home. I have NEVER seen a two year old pee that long - the poop came about 5 minutes later. I think it just wanted to make sure we were home. You never realize when you become a parent what an important part of your life poop becomes! Just - whatever you do - be the boss!

Just say "yes"

My two year daughter loves it when I say yes - to anything. What kid doesn't???

The problem is, she thinks "I'll think about it", "Maybe", and "We'll see" are all difinitive YES answers also.

If I say one of the alternate responses, I get an emphatic and high-pitched "Dank you, dank you, dank you Mommy!!" She assumes that the good fate is sealed.

Ha! I love her enthusiasim - but I feel bad when the "Well see" turns out to be a "no". She helps me to think about my answers though, and to make sure I follow through and keep my word. That is what kids really love!

Ugh! I'm a wuss...

Okay - I could actually write a thesis on this topic - but it is a blog. Therefore, all of my reasoning and beliefs and research will not be included. That being said: I did a dumb thing today.

I used to be the woman to go to the doctor and get kids vaccinated because that is what American women DO. Not anymore. So... my first two kids had all their shots. My second two kids have had "some". (and even those I wish I would've had more 'balls' to tell the Dr. 'no'.)

Anyway.... my four year old - one who had all her shots as a baby - had her 4 year old check up today. She 'needed' her Hep B shot - and future Kindergarten shots. I said no to the kindergarten shots today, but somehow - and this part gets fuzzy - I allowed her to get the Hep B.

This is most annoying to me, because - I think the Heb B shot is useless for babies and children. It was originally made for druggies and prostitutes......
Our babies and 4 year olds just don't need this particular shot. And I gave it.

This is my loathing and venting for the day...... agree or not I feel I did a dumb thing, and I'm mad I wussed out at telling the Dr. 'no'.

Whatta book!!

My four year old and I were looking at a Richard Scarry word book the other day. She was on the zoo page and was pointing out various animals....
Then she flipped the page to a farm page and pointed to the cow and said "cow". At that VERY moment, my stomach growled a funny sound.


"Mom!! Did you hear that? Did you hear the cow 'moo'???" She asked me so very excitedly??
"What a cool book!!"

She was bummed the other animals wouldn't make sounds - I didn't have the heart to tell her mommy's tummy was just hungry.

Carpool Lane - a mystery

So, the school sent home 'directions' on how the carpool 'kiss and go' works at the end of the school day.
1. Put a sign on your dash with your last name.
(I did that - I don't think anyone noticed. None of the other cars have one either.)
2. Please observe the sign that says "right turn only" out of the parking lot.
(I checked today - there IS no sign and we all still turned left...)
3. If you are going to park in the parking lot, please stay parked until the kiss and go line is finished.
(Someone pulled out from a parked spot right in front of me today.)

The list of rules continues, and I didn't see any change in the actual kiss and go line this week. I have heard many a complaint from moms at other schools about this same subject, but right now, the parents at our school have no excuses. We were just instructed on every detail of the procedure. What kind of example are we setting for the kids if we refuse to disobey the rules? (Not that the kids read our letter - but it is a weird irony.)

Just a little venting... ahhh.....

Where did the cooties go???

My son.... ah, the tender age of six.

He came home last week and when I asked what he did at school that day, he informed me that he and his best friend Henry chased a girl, Presley, around the playground during recess. Mmmm... if that doesn't make you proud of sending your child to school - what does??? That was the highlight of the day apparently.

Yesterday I got a nice update from the boy. He got into the van quite excitedly in the carpool lane saying he had news to announce. Again, I being the silly mama, thought it might, just might be about something scholastic. Wrong again.

Presley announced to Alex and Henry that she is in love with them. I asked Alex what he thought about that - crazy, great, not good... etc. He told me that he thought it was nice. I agreed, saying that it is nice when people love us. That is when he told me that he told her that he loves her too. What??? What happened to boys and girls having cooties??? Six year olds - in "love" really???

On one hand I love not hearing how girls are gross - but this was unexpected so soon too. Boy! Looking forward to the rest of the school year! yee haw

Too much stuff

So, today I took on the project of moving the baby to her own room and moving our daughter from that room by our master bedroom into the new 'big girl' room. Basically we are putting our 2 and 4 year old girls in the same room. I just finished painting the big girl room to a neutral color (it was blue from when the boy was in there) - and the baby needs to start sleeping in her own room because that arrangement isn't working for anybody!

Wowza! The girls have too much stuff! I can barely FIT all their junk (for lack of a better word) in that room! I completely emptied the closet to better assess and organize. I'm so glad I did! There was a surprising amount of junk in there to toss, to put away in other parts of the house, and to give away. Still, after all that, I have baby dolls and doll clothes, and barbies and a bunch of other stuff that has yet to find a 'home' in there.

How in the world did we accumulate SO much??? I am realizing today that basically - the whole house needs to be gone through. From the coat closet to the linen closet and everywhere in between. Don't get me wrong - we are blessed for sure and not in great need, and for that I am thankful - but perhaps we can bless others with some of our overflow!

PS: the girls went down for a nap - and I already had to seperate one of them due to talking. Hopefully betime will be a bit smoother!

Quiet Please.....

Have you ever been in a minivan with four kids? If not, let me fill you in: it can get a bit loud. Singing, fighting, competition to tell the parent(s) up front the latest news, stories, exclamations of a first seen bulldozer/plane/bird..... and the list of noise goes on.

Today as we were driving to the school my four year old shouted over us all trying to get us to be quiet. We settled down and I asked her what the matter was. She said that God was talking to her and she was trying to hear what He was saying.

(Awww... hello!)

So after a few moments of silence (I wasn't sure how long it would last), I asked her what God was telling her. She said she didn't know.

She never figured out what God was trying to tell her, but her mom learned a lesson. There are times I need to shout over all the noise in my life to listen to what God is telling me - even if I don't catch it on the first try.

Baby Chef

I am so proud of my 'baby' girl! Our 2 year old helped me make dinner the other night. She was sooo proud and so happy to help with the salad. Pictures say a thousand words... so this blog is short. Just enjoy the pics!

four cutest things in the world

1: My six year old son playing Yahtzee with his dad and bragging that his numbers look like "grown-up writing".

2: The way my four month old is getting so big, yet still fits in my arms like a little living doll. She is s snuggler and so amazingly adorable.

3: The way my 2 year old demands a kiss and hug "in her bed" each night. You can kiss her in the livingroom, the hall - her own bedroom, but nothing counts with her unless you do it "in her bed" ie: sitting on her bed while she is tucked in.

4: The way my 4 year old daughter stares at herself for what seems like hours after putting her potato-head earrings on her own ears. She is definitely ALL girl.

Okay, those are just the cutest things today.... but what can I say, I'm in love with my fam!

Lisa Leonard Designs Jewelry GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Lisa Leonard Designs Jewelry GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Can't hurt right??? :)

Not so scary

There I was putting my makeup on infront of the bathroom mirror. It was concealer for those dark undereye circles - to be more specific.

My two year old girl looked up and asked what I was doing. I told her mommy was putting on makeup so that I won't look so scary when we go to the store.

Sometimes you just forget how much little ears hear.

Next thing I know she is tugging on my pants asking for lipstick. 'Why?' I ask.

"So I won't be so scary" she answered! Ha!

So, I'm not wanting to teach my girls that makeup is necessary, or needed to not scare people, but on the otherhand, this is one of those funny 'repeats' you get from toddlers.

Camping with the fam

I did it! I survived. I more than survived. I thrived.

I have to admit. I was a little nervous about going camping - in a tent - for two nights - in the 'woods' - with a 5 year old, 4 year old, 2 year old (who is potty training) and a 2 month old baby.
That's right - four kids 5 and under in a tent for two days. And the forecast called for rain.

But the trip was sooo nice and actually quite pleasant other than the rain washing out our dinner and campfire the second night.

And the baby?? She slept 10 (TEN!!) hours each night! She doesn't even do that at home! I was spoiled! We've been home a week and she hasn't kept that schedule up at all!

The kids were good. It was our 2 yr old's first time in a sleeping bag, they all loved being on that big matress, and playing with flashlights and glow sticks at night. There were hikes with dad, walks with mom and dad into the national forest, trips to the playground, and mini golf and a kiddy train in town. Even the drive there and back was nice! All I kept saying to P about the trip was that God gave us so much favor!

The only thing I wish I personally could've done is gone into town and shopped! But maybe next year. I'd love to go with P and do 'grown-up' stuff. Camp. Starbucks. Hikes without kids. Hmm... sounds fun.

But as far as this year goes, with all the kids as young as they are. The trip couldn't have been better! What a great memory! Every year from here on out can only be easier, right?? So, yea! Bring on the family camping trips!

PS: that's the short of it, may tell more detail later, maybe, maybe not, but I have a little kid who keeps begging me for food, so this is all I can report right now. Apparently, someone in my house is starving to death.

My favorite place

I have a favorite place right now.

We all have favorite places in different times in our lives.
Throughout childhood I can remember different favorite places: playing Barbies in the basement next to my sister, Tickles (a Chucky Cheese meets Mr. Biggs kinds of place), digging in the sandbox all the way to China....etc.....

Right now, my favorite place of all is standing in our bedroom in front of our big round vanity mirror.
Not admiring myself, I might add..... but standing there with my two month old baby girl on my chest - looking at her. Trying so hard to burn that image of her little body into my memory's hard drive. Not ever wanting to forget her smell, her size, her snuggle, the way her arm is starting to cling to mine, or how her tiny fingers rest on my chest or grab onto my shirt. Photos are good, but a living memory is better.

Moms try hard to remember everything from those precious baby days, but when it is your last baby, and every day is the last day EVER you will EVER have such a small, sweet, precious life in your arms, all your own..... you try harder than before to never forget.

I will never again have a little baby of my own. I will never again have a limp little tiny scrunched up newborn. I will never again have a little one month old starting to hold their head up. I will never again.......

And this is why standing in front of the large vanity mirror with my baby girl on my chest is my favorite place to be. Our house is a disaster. Our room is a mess. The laundry is piled high. The dishes are dirty. But it all can wait - I'm staring at the beauty of this baby on my chest.

Ode to Breastfeeding

When you are pregnant, perhaps then more than ever you think about this. Will you or won't you? If so, will it hurt? You watch others. Seems simple enough. Ahh... the joys of nursing. Wait a minute, what???

• Have you ever had a baby crying so fiercely that even when you "shove" your nipple in their mouth they don't even notice it and cry fiercely right into your boob?

• Have you ever pumped milk and looked in the bottle only to discover the milk is now a pinkish tint thanks to the fact your nipple is bloody from the over use - of never being squeezed like this before???

• Speaking of being squeezed, has nursing a baby ever felt like a rabid squirrel is chewing your spine out through your boob??

• What about sneezing? My baby pulls off of me to sneeze on my nipple then latches back on to finish her meal.

• Throw up is a FUN one. I have been thrown up on countless times nursing my four babies. My personal favorite is when there is a pool of it in your bra. Sometimes there is more spit up than you knew in there and you accidentally reclip your bra.....ewww.

• Poop. It is weird to have a baby actively nursing from you and pooping their loose, loose mustard poop into the diaper resting on your leg/arm. I guess it is true that what goes in, must come out, but seriously, at the same time??

• My baby girl just stopped nursing the other day to literally lift her upper leg and let a 'big one' rip - and then peacefully went back to her meal.

• What about the struggles of waking the hard-sleeping newborn? Ice on the back, thumping their little feet?

• Have you ever been woken by piercing cries at 2:30 am, only to latch them on after a 40 minute newborn struggle, and they fall asleep? So then you spend another hour trying to get them to nurse and finally they do, then you all go to sleep, only to have the baby cry and start the process over in just a little over an hour later????

• I do like it when they 'talk' and coo to you while nursing. Melts your heart. Like they are saying "thank you mommy. This milk is warm and yummy! I like the taste of the chocolate cake you had last night."

• Or, simply when they look at you - their precious little face staring into yours. A precious moment, a special bonding time.

• Has your baby ever smiled at you - and thus losing their latch? Funny.

• The baby falls asleep nursing. At 3am, or 3pm. Either way, it is so beautiful. And fulfilling. Can you even bear to take them off and set them down? Infancy passes too quickly.

For all you women out there who no longer have a nursing baby, perhaps this has jogged some great memories. Mommy amnesia happens all too quickly. You forget the little details. For those of you who bottle fed by choice or not, perhaps you can still relate, or are glad you missed some of this..... And for the ladies out there that are not yet at this point, happy decision making! But, don't let a little throw up in the bra keep you from an amazing gift!

Something I learned today

A few weeks ago our church had Compassion Sunday. A day that Compassion International uses to spread the word of their child sponsorship program to churches across America in hopes you will begin sponsorship of a needy third-world child.

We decided to sponsor two children. One boy and one girl. We ended up with them both being as old as my oldest (our boy). Leonardo and Natalia. We brought home the information packets and hung the photos of them on the fridge. My hubby told our kiddos to say a prayer for Leonardo and Natalia each night.

Now, skip to last night. My son has pink eye. His eye hurts, is red and irritated, kinda puffy. We took him to the Dr., wrestled 2 eye drops into him and put him to bed. We said goodnight and started to leave our son's room.

"Wait" our son called out, "can we pray?" Of course we said yes. I knew he wanted us to pray for his hurting eye. And I was ready... but not ready to hear, "We have to pray for Leonardo and Natalia." He then began to pray for them, and their needs, and that they would not get a pink hurting eye like him.

Not once did my son ask for God to ease his own discomfort, or take his infection away. Just completely, innocently prayed for the needs of others. Whoa. Back the cart up. Do I do that? Do I, can I, just pray for the needs of others when I myself and hurting, whiny, and uncomfortable? No. I don't. I usually whine to God about how I need his help or I will die. (I used to think some of the Bible was dramatic, but I should listen to my own outcries sometimes!!) I know myself though. I rarely, if ever completely concentrate my prayers on others when I am hurting - physically or emotionally. I can definitely honestly pray for you when I'm doing okay, but when I am hurting I am "me" centered. Ouch.

Taught a major lesson by my five year old. Hope I learned something that will stick with me through the course of time. I'd be better off if it did!

Lucky penny

So, I'm talking to my friend on the phone and she just told me that her five year old son found a $20 bill. (Yes, I'm talking and blogging at the same time.)

Why does that kind of luck happen to kids? Why is it that you don't hear of grown-ups finding that kind of cash on the ground??

You could argue that it is because kids are already usually looking down at the ground anyway, while us grown-ups are paying attention to where we are going. However, with my kids in tow, I do look down alot and am always pointing out the gum/puddle/goo on the ground to avoid. "Please don't step in the goose poop, honey."

When I DO find money on the ground.... it is usually a penny. But, at least my kids feel rich when they find a penny! Ahhh.... to be a kid again.

A new era of me

Hello self! Welcome to the 21st century! I have a blog!



I love writing, and I love capturing tidbits of my life on paper to remember, so this seemed like the next logical step. I hardly ever write anymore, but I'm always near a computer, so I'll record my life's happenings here. Only now, I have a potential public audience.
I realize anyone can, technically, see this blog, but somewhere deep inside I honestly believe it will be pretty quiet. Perhaps my sister or mom might check it once in awhile.... I don't know. I'm really out of touch. I know what a blog is, but really, who sits around reading strangers blogs? How do they 'find' them? I hear of celebrities having blogs and I think, really? Their business out there for anyone to read? How do you find their blog? Do you literally Google "Brad Pitt's blog"??



I'm in my very early 30's. Just last year, 2008, I learned how to write and send a text message. A task I'm thinking my five year old could do. I don't have cable, and so, I don't even know how to work my friends TV's that do have it, let alone managing a dvr device. Most washing machines are beyond my technology know-how. My sister-in-law got a new washing machine a few years ago that had all these combinations for what level of dirty clothes you were washing and buttons to select what kind of stains you were working with. ie: jelly, grass, etc.


I just don't have that kind of time. Dirty clothes. Just swish them in soap and water and hope for the best!



So here I am on the internet rambling about things that, frankly, I don't think anyone will really care about. But really, who has a blog with really 'need-to-know' info?? This is just a really great way to capture the craziness and blissfulness of life. Not to mention a place to rant if I feel like it! So... mom and sis, and potentially the other one reader, :) enjoy the randomness to come. It's like the Seinfeld blog. That was a show about nothing. This will probably be a blog about nothing. Yet, Seinfeld was a huge success, so you just never know.......